I know an old lady who...
puts conkers round her rooms as a spider deterrent.  Anyone else heard
of this?
I don't mean she whaps them with the conkers for sport, of course.

Tiddy Ogg  wrote in message
news:jt0ub5t5idjf7btv0erdbuh1inp5eri5jp@4ax.com...
> I know an old lady who...
> puts conkers round her rooms as a spider deterrent.  Anyone else heard
> of this?
> I don't mean she whaps them with the conkers for sport, of course.
>


Last week we'd had enough of one huge spider taking up residence. Catching
sight, from a corner of an eye, of that big lump scurrying across the floor
and up the curtains for no apparent reason other than to annoy, was too
much. Scooping into a box and summary eviction to the garden for him/her.

--
General electronic repairs, mainly music equipment these days ,
but anything considered other than TVs and PCs
http://www.divdev.fsnet.co.uk/repairs.htm

Diverse Devices, Southampton, England

N_Cook wrote:
> 
> 
> Last week we'd had enough of one huge spider taking up residence. Catching
> sight, from a corner of an eye, of that big lump scurrying across the floor
> and up the curtains for no apparent reason other than to annoy, was too
> much. Scooping into a box and summary eviction to the garden for him/her.

If that was a Tegenaria (The UK species, BTW don't bite;  the Wikipedia 
article you'll get for the first hit on that is US based) they are 
originally cave spiders.  Put them out, and they'll make a bolt for the 
nearest cover - which is probably your house again!

BTW Your signature should start with a single line containing dash dash 
space.  You have no space!

Andy

I suspect that Ialdabaoth created Imperfection so that on this day Sun, 27 Sep
2009 07:20:11 +0100, one purporting to be Tiddy Ogg 
could write :

>I know an old lady who...
>puts conkers round her rooms as a spider deterrent.  Anyone else heard
>of this?
>I don't mean she whaps them with the conkers for sport, of course.

Very effective.

Tiddy Ogg  wrote in message
news:jt0ub5t5idjf7btv0erdbuh1inp5eri5jp@4ax.com...
> I know an old lady who...
> puts conkers round her rooms as a spider deterrent.  Anyone else heard
> of this?
> I don't mean she whaps them with the conkers for sport, of course.
>


This story appeared on the quasi-weather spot on local ITV news yesterday
evening.

--
General electronic repairs, mainly music equipment these days ,
but anything considered other than TVs and PCs
http://www.divdev.fsnet.co.uk/repairs.htm

Diverse Devices, Southampton, England

On Tue, 29 Sep 2009 08:24:33 +0100, "N_Cook" 
wrote:

>Tiddy Ogg  wrote in message
>news:jt0ub5t5idjf7btv0erdbuh1inp5eri5jp@4ax.com...
>> I know an old lady who...
>> puts conkers round her rooms as a spider deterrent.  Anyone else heard
>> of this?
>> I don't mean she whaps them with the conkers for sport, of course.
>>
>
>
>This story appeared on the quasi-weather spot on local ITV news yesterday
>evening.
Did they pick it up from here, or is it a more common belief/theory?

Tiddy Ogg  wrote in message
news:4pe3c5hj9a0hkjmoqu3np17tv53njuqhc2@4ax.com...
> On Tue, 29 Sep 2009 08:24:33 +0100, "N_Cook" 
> wrote:
>
> >Tiddy Ogg  wrote in message
> >news:jt0ub5t5idjf7btv0erdbuh1inp5eri5jp@4ax.com...
> >> I know an old lady who...
> >> puts conkers round her rooms as a spider deterrent.  Anyone else heard
> >> of this?
> >> I don't mean she whaps them with the conkers for sport, of course.
> >>
> >
> >
> >This story appeared on the quasi-weather spot on local ITV news yesterday
> >evening.
> Did they pick it up from here, or is it a more common belief/theory?
>


Only caught the end of it , an interview with someone with a lethargic
tarantula-like in a vivarium. Finishing off with jocular reference to
conkers hung around a room not keeping that one at bay or something like
that, obviously referred to previously, before I had turned channels.


--
General electronic repairs, mainly music equipment these days ,
but anything considered other than TVs and PCs
http://www.divdev.fsnet.co.uk/repairs.htm

Diverse Devices, Southampton, England

Tiddy Ogg wrote:
> On Tue, 29 Sep 2009 08:24:33 +0100, "N_Cook" 
> wrote:
> 
>> Tiddy Ogg  wrote in message
>> news:jt0ub5t5idjf7btv0erdbuh1inp5eri5jp@4ax.com...
>>> I know an old lady who...
>>> puts conkers round her rooms as a spider deterrent.  Anyone else heard
>>> of this?
>>> I don't mean she whaps them with the conkers for sport, of course.
>>>
>>
>> This story appeared on the quasi-weather spot on local ITV news yesterday
>> evening.
> Did they pick it up from here, or is it a more common belief/theory?
> 
  Oh please tell me it's true, I can't do with them big house spids and 
they are rife this year!

Ron - gone conkering

On Tue, 29 Sep 2009 12:51:35 +0100, Ron wrote:

>   Oh please tell me it's true, I can't do with them big house spids and
> they are rife this year!

Deploy FWSE with keywords "spiders" and "conkers" and decide for 
yourself. There's certainly plenty of hits.

We always put a few around the house in the hope it'll work. I'm not 
bothered by spids, but the missus is.

-- 
Anahata
anahata@treewind.co.uk  ==//== 01638 720444
http://www.treewind.co.uk ==//== http://www.myspace.com/maryanahata

The message 
from Ron  contains these words:

>   Oh please tell me it's true, I can't do with them big house spids and 
> they are rife this year!

The sort that when you accost them with upturned cup and old postcard
from Penarth, because the sound of their hobnail boots on the lino is
too loud, look up at you with disdain and say "Sod off, mate"?

-- 
Skipweasel
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

Guy King wrote:
> The message 
> from Ron  contains these words:
> 
>>   Oh please tell me it's true, I can't do with them big house spids and 
>> they are rife this year!
> 
> The sort that when you accost them with upturned cup and old postcard
> from Penarth, because the sound of their hobnail boots on the lino is
> too loud, look up at you with disdain and say "Sod off, mate"?
> 
Some of the ones we've been getting won't fit under a pint pot!

Guy King  wrote
>The message 
>from Ron  contains these words:
>
>>   Oh please tell me it's true, I can't do with them big house spids and 
>> they are rife this year!
>
>The sort that when you accost them with upturned cup and old postcard
>from Penarth, because the sound of their hobnail boots on the lino is
>too loud, look up at you with disdain and say "Sod off, mate"?
>
I've got a couple of them (great hairy legs and huge fangs), who start
their rounds in the late evening just after Chucking-out Time.
One of them brought in a whole sheep the other night and I had to
finally lay down the law to these anarchic arachnids. 
After being beaten up by them we have come to an understanding ...
-- 
Roger Hunt

Roger Hunt wrote:
> Guy King  wrote
>> The message 
>>from Ron  contains these words:
>>>   Oh please tell me it's true, I can't do with them big house spids and 
>>> they are rife this year!
>> The sort that when you accost them with upturned cup and old postcard
>>from Penarth, because the sound of their hobnail boots on the lino is
>> too loud, look up at you with disdain and say "Sod off, mate"?
>>
> I've got a couple of them (great hairy legs and huge fangs), who start
> their rounds in the late evening just after Chucking-out Time.
> One of them brought in a whole sheep the other night and I had to
> finally lay down the law to these anarchic arachnids. 
> After being beaten up by them we have come to an understanding ...

You were lucky! When I were a lad...

Ron  wrote
>Roger Hunt wrote:
>> Guy King  wrote
>>> The message 
>>>from Ron  contains these words:
>>>>   Oh please tell me it's true, I can't do with them big house spids and 
>>>> they are rife this year!
>>> The sort that when you accost them with upturned cup and old postcard
>>>from Penarth, because the sound of their hobnail boots on the lino is
>>> too loud, look up at you with disdain and say "Sod off, mate"?
>>>
>> I've got a couple of them (great hairy legs and huge fangs), who start
>> their rounds in the late evening just after Chucking-out Time.
>> One of them brought in a whole sheep the other night and I had to
>> finally lay down the law to these anarchic arachnids. 
>> After being beaten up by them we have come to an understanding ...
>
>You were lucky! When I were a lad...

That were in the Gnoybvqf I unforget. How they got the Blue whale into
the jvgarff obk I'll never know.
-- 
Roger Hunt

On Tue, 29 Sep 2009 16:37:26 +0100
Roger Hunt  wrote:

> Guy King  wrote
> >The message 
> >from Ron  contains these words:
> >
> >>   Oh please tell me it's true, I can't do with them big house spids
> >> and they are rife this year!
> >
> >The sort that when you accost them with upturned cup and old postcard
> >from Penarth, because the sound of their hobnail boots on the lino is
> >too loud, look up at you with disdain and say "Sod off, mate"?
> >
> I've got a couple of them (great hairy legs and huge fangs), who start
> their rounds in the late evening just after Chucking-out Time.
> One of them brought in a whole sheep the other night and I had to
> finally lay down the law to these anarchic arachnids. 
> After being beaten up by them we have come to an understanding ...

	Just play them "Boris the Spider" then show them a suitably large
book.

-- 
Steve O'Hara-Smith                          |   Directable Mirror Arrays
C:>WIN                                      | A better way to focus the sun
The computer obeys and wins.                |    licences available see
You lose and Bill collects.                 |    http://www.sohara.org/

> Tiddy Ogg  wrote in message
> news:jt0ub5t5idjf7btv0erdbuh1inp5eri5jp@4ax.com...
>> I know an old lady who...
>> puts conkers round her rooms as a spider deterrent.  Anyone else heard
>> of this?

I once ohled some "spider repellant" for my sister who has a fear of such 
things. It was meant to be sprayed at doors and windows to keep them from 
entering. One of the active ingredients was horse chestnut extract.

-=# Ben Coulson #=-

Ron  wrote in
news:UsudnUxEJ49VaVzXnZ2dnUVZ8gNi4p2d@bt.com: 

>   Oh please tell me it's true, I can't do with them big house spids
>   and 
> they are rife this year!

Must be. There's not a conker to be had for thousands of miles round here 
and the place has got loads of spiders, some of them quite nasty. Yet again 
I believe the shed has solved one of life's great mysteries.

-- 
Graeme

Bringing you the news from Her Majesty(hock, spit)'s southern colonies

Graeme  wrote
>Ron  wrote in
>news:UsudnUxEJ49VaVzXnZ2dnUVZ8gNi4p2d@bt.com: 
>
>>   Oh please tell me it's true, I can't do with them big house spids
>>   and 
>> they are rife this year!
>
>Must be. There's not a conker to be had for thousands of miles round here 
>and the place has got loads of spiders, some of them quite nasty. Yet again 
>I believe the shed has solved one of life's great mysteries.
>
[Wikipedia]
In 1993 ex-Python Michael Palin was disqualified from a Conkers
competition in the United Kingdom for onxvat his conker and soaking 
it in ivartne.

Gosh I say! The rotter!
-- 
Roger Hunt

Ron wrote:
>> The sort that when you accost them with upturned cup and old postcard
>> from Penarth, because the sound of their hobnail boots on the lino is
>> too loud, look up at you with disdain and say "Sod off, mate"?
>>
> Some of the ones we've been getting won't fit under a pint pot!

Thems int spiders, them's traffic wardens, silly.

-- 
When you let me fall, grew my own wings,
Now I'm as tall as the sky.

The message <fJRiXIA$6pwKFwB2@nospam.demon.co.uk>
from Roger Hunt  contains these words:

> In 1993 ex-Python Michael Palin was disqualified from a Conkers
> competition in the United Kingdom for onxvat his conker and soaking 
> it in ivartne.

> Gosh I say! The rotter!

Even now, the kids have a vat of conkers marinading in the airing
cupboard. I had to insist on a lid or all the towels would have smelt of
vinegar.

-- 
Skipweasel
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

Guy King  wrote
>The message <fJRiXIA$6pwKFwB2@nospam.demon.co.uk>
>from Roger Hunt  contains these words:
>
>> In 1993 ex-Python Michael Palin was disqualified from a Conkers
>> competition in the United Kingdom for onxvat his conker and soaking 
>> it in ivartne.
>
>> Gosh I say! The rotter!
>
>Even now, the kids have a vat of conkers marinading in the airing
>cupboard. 

I suppose when they're older the same vat will hold the home-brew.
>I had to insist on a lid or all the towels would have smelt of
>vinegar.
>
Towels? Luxury.
-- 
Roger Hunt

On Tue, 29 Sep 2009 22:17:36 +0100, "Ben Coulson"
 wrote:

>> Tiddy Ogg  wrote in message
>> news:jt0ub5t5idjf7btv0erdbuh1inp5eri5jp@4ax.com...
>>> I know an old lady who...
>>> puts conkers round her rooms as a spider deterrent.  Anyone else heard
>>> of this?
>
>I once ohled some "spider repellant" for my sister who has a fear of such 
>things. It was meant to be sprayed at doors and windows to keep them from 
>entering. One of the active ingredients was horse chestnut extract.
>
>-=# Ben Coulson #=- 
>

Thanks folks.  It was brought up by Sarah Kennedy on Radio 2 this
morning - mentioning a woman who believed it.

On Tue, 29 Sep 2009 14:21:19 +0100, anahata  wrote:

> On Tue, 29 Sep 2009 12:51:35 +0100, Ron wrote:
>
>>   Oh please tell me it's true, I can't do with them big house spids and
>> they are rife this year!
>
> Deploy FWSE with keywords "spiders" and "conkers" and decide for
> yourself. There's certainly plenty of hits.
>
> We always put a few around the house in the hope it'll work. I'm not
> bothered by spids, but the missus is.
>
It's all a conspiracy by the funcr-fuvsgvat (careful Frank) spiders that  
rule us! the spiders hollow out the conkers to make nests for more spiders!

Nurse my foil hat has fallen off!


-- 
Hi there!

On Tue, 29 Sep 2009 15:55:07 +0100, Ron  wrote:

> Guy King wrote:
>> The message 
>> from Ron  contains these words:
>>
>>>   Oh please tell me it's true, I can't do with them big house spids  
>>> and they are rife this year!
>>  The sort that when you accost them with upturned cup and old postcard
>> from Penarth, because the sound of their hobnail boots on the lino is
>> too loud, look up at you with disdain and say "Sod off, mate"?
>>
> Some of the ones we've been getting won't fit under a pint pot!

Pint's are for Drinking, not Spilling.

in similar aphorisms: A bottle of Sherry's not just for Xmas

-- 
Hi there!

On Wed, 30 Sep 2009 00:56:47 +0100, Roger Hunt   
wrote:

> Graeme  wrote
>> Ron  wrote in
>> news:UsudnUxEJ49VaVzXnZ2dnUVZ8gNi4p2d@bt.com:
>>
>>>   Oh please tell me it's true, I can't do with them big house spids
>>>   and
>>> they are rife this year!
>>
>> Must be. There's not a conker to be had for thousands of miles round  
>> here
>> and the place has got loads of spiders, some of them quite nasty. Yet  
>> again
>> I believe the shed has solved one of life's great mysteries.
>>
> [Wikipedia]
> In 1993 ex-Python Michael Palin was disqualified from a Conkers
> competition in the United Kingdom for onxvat his conker and soaking
> it in ivartne.
>
> Gosh I say! The rotter!

I gooved it was fgnaqneq cenpgvpr?
(sorry hants, we all speak fluent rot in the shed)


-- 
Nuns! Reverse!

Esra Sdrawkcab  wrote
>On Wed, 30 Sep 2009 00:56:47 +0100, Roger Hunt   
>wrote:
>> Graeme  wrote
>>> Ron  wrote in
>>> news:UsudnUxEJ49VaVzXnZ2dnUVZ8gNi4p2d@bt.com:
>>>
>>>>   Oh please tell me it's true, I can't do with them big house spids
>>>>   and
>>>> they are rife this year!
>>>
>>> Must be. There's not a conker to be had for thousands of miles round  
>>> here
>>> and the place has got loads of spiders, some of them quite nasty. Yet  
>>> again
>>> I believe the shed has solved one of life's great mysteries.
>>>
>> [Wikipedia]
>> In 1993 ex-Python Michael Palin was disqualified from a Conkers
>> competition in the United Kingdom for onxvat his conker and soaking
>> it in ivartne.
>>
>> Gosh I say! The rotter!
>
>I gooved it was fgnaqneq cenpgvpr?
>(sorry hants, we all speak fluent rot in the shed)
>
OK - rotter is a rotten word to use. How about ebgvsre?
-- 
Roger Hunt

Esra Sdrawkcab wrote:
> On Wed, 30 Sep 2009 00:56:47 +0100, Roger Hunt 
>  wrote:
> 
>> Graeme  wrote
>>> Ron  wrote in
>>> news:UsudnUxEJ49VaVzXnZ2dnUVZ8gNi4p2d@bt.com:
>>>
>>>>   Oh please tell me it's true, I can't do with them big house spids
>>>>   and
>>>> they are rife this year!
>>>
>>> Must be. There's not a conker to be had for thousands of miles round 
>>> here
>>> and the place has got loads of spiders, some of them quite nasty. Yet 
>>> again
>>> I believe the shed has solved one of life's great mysteries.
>>>
>> [Wikipedia]
>> In 1993 ex-Python Michael Palin was disqualified from a Conkers
>> competition in the United Kingdom for onxvat his conker and soaking
>> it in ivartne.
>>
>> Gosh I say! The rotter!
> 
> I gooved it was fgnaqneq cenpgvpr?
> (sorry hants, we all speak fluent rot in the shed)
> 
> 
dunno about fluent...

On Wed, 30 Sep 2009 10:20:48 +0100, Ron  wrote:

> Esra Sdrawkcab wrote:
>> On Wed, 30 Sep 2009 00:56:47 +0100, Roger Hunt  
>>  wrote:
>>
>>> Graeme  wrote
>>>> Ron  wrote in
>>>> news:UsudnUxEJ49VaVzXnZ2dnUVZ8gNi4p2d@bt.com:
>>>>
>>>>>   Oh please tell me it's true, I can't do with them big house spids
>>>>>   and
>>>>> they are rife this year!
>>>>
>>>> Must be. There's not a conker to be had for thousands of miles round  
>>>> here
>>>> and the place has got loads of spiders, some of them quite nasty. Yet  
>>>> again
>>>> I believe the shed has solved one of life's great mysteries.
>>>>
>>> [Wikipedia]
>>> In 1993 ex-Python Michael Palin was disqualified from a Conkers
>>> competition in the United Kingdom for onxvat his conker and soaking
>>> it in ivartne.
>>>
>>> Gosh I say! The rotter!
>>  I gooved it was fgnaqneq cenpgvpr?
>> (sorry hants, we all speak fluent rot in the shed)
>>
> dunno about fluent...

it's electronic - like e-mail, so it's e-fluent.
(Ok I use an addon for decoding porpoises).
-- 
Hi there!

Albert Ross wrote:
> On Wed, 30 Sep 2009 10:20:48 +0100, Ron  wrote:
> 
>> Esra Sdrawkcab wrote:
>>> On Wed, 30 Sep 2009 00:56:47 +0100, Roger Hunt 
>>>  wrote:
>>>
>>>> Graeme  wrote
>>>>> Ron  wrote in
>>>>> news:UsudnUxEJ49VaVzXnZ2dnUVZ8gNi4p2d@bt.com:
>>>>>
>>>>>>   Oh please tell me it's true, I can't do with them big house spids
>>>>>>   and
>>>>>> they are rife this year!
>>>>>
>>>>> Must be. There's not a conker to be had for thousands of miles 
>>>>> round here
>>>>> and the place has got loads of spiders, some of them quite nasty. 
>>>>> Yet again
>>>>> I believe the shed has solved one of life's great mysteries.
>>>>>
>>>> [Wikipedia]
>>>> In 1993 ex-Python Michael Palin was disqualified from a Conkers
>>>> competition in the United Kingdom for onxvat his conker and soaking
>>>> it in ivartne.
>>>>
>>>> Gosh I say! The rotter!
>>>  I gooved it was fgnaqneq cenpgvpr?
>>> (sorry hants, we all speak fluent rot in the shed)
>>>
>> dunno about fluent...
> 
> it's electronic - like e-mail, so it's e-fluent.
> (Ok I use an addon for decoding porpoises).

Those good people of Hampshire must think we are all a bit odd here in 
ye shedde.

UkuleleRon (Normal for Norfolk (unfortunately I don't live in Norfolk))

> [Wikipedia]
> In 1993 ex-Python Michael Palin was disqualified from a Conkers
> competition in the United Kingdom for onxvat his conker and soaking 
> it in ivartne.
> 
> Gosh I say! The rotter!

Forensic science used to beat conker cheats:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2009/sep/27/conker-cheat-crackdown-poulton

Ron  wrote in message
news:QoSdneHQ-cNsv17XnZ2dnUVZ8rRi4p2d@bt.com...
> Esra Sdrawkcab wrote:
> > On Wed, 30 Sep 2009 00:56:47 +0100, Roger Hunt
> >  wrote:
> >
> >> Graeme  wrote
> >>> Ron  wrote in
> >>> news:UsudnUxEJ49VaVzXnZ2dnUVZ8gNi4p2d@bt.com:
> >>>
> >>>>   Oh please tell me it's true, I can't do with them big house spids
> >>>>   and
> >>>> they are rife this year!
> >>>
> >>> Must be. There's not a conker to be had for thousands of miles round
> >>> here
> >>> and the place has got loads of spiders, some of them quite nasty. Yet
> >>> again
> >>> I believe the shed has solved one of life's great mysteries.
> >>>
> >> [Wikipedia]
> >> In 1993 ex-Python Michael Palin was disqualified from a Conkers
> >> competition in the United Kingdom for onxvat his conker and soaking
> >> it in ivartne.
> >>
> >> Gosh I say! The rotter!
> >
> > I gooved it was fgnaqneq cenpgvpr?
> > (sorry hants, we all speak fluent rot in the shed)
> >
> >
> dunno about fluent...


Here in Hants, flu' an' trot is a medical condition

--
General electronic repairs, mainly music equipment these days ,
but anything considered other than TVs and PCs
http://www.divdev.fsnet.co.uk/repairs.htm

Diverse Devices, Southampton, England

Ancipital said:
> Ron wrote:
>>> The sort that when you accost them with upturned cup and old postcard
>>> from Penarth, because the sound of their hobnail boots on the lino is
>>> too loud, look up at you with disdain and say "Sod off, mate"?
>>>
>> Some of the ones we've been getting won't fit under a pint pot!
>
> Thems int spiders, them's traffic wardens, silly.

You let traffic wardens onto your lino ?


-- 
Richard Robinson
"The whole plan hinged upon the natural curiosity of potatoes" - S. Lem

My email address is at http://www.qualmograph.org.uk/contact.html

On Tue, 29 Sep 2009 15:07:23 +0100, Guy King 
wrote:

>The message 
>from Ron  contains these words:
>
>>   Oh please tell me it's true, I can't do with them big house spids and 
>> they are rife this year!
>
>The sort that when you accost them with upturned cup and old postcard
>from Penarth, because the sound of their hobnail boots on the lino is
>too loud, look up at you with disdain and say "Sod off, mate"?

The sort that, overnight, make vast webs across your front door, to
snare you for breakfast when you try to leave for jbex.

--Holly

N_Cook  wrote:

> > >> [Wikipedia]
> > >> In 1993 ex-Python Michael Palin was disqualified from a Conkers
> > >> competition in the United Kingdom for onxvat his conker and soaking
> > >> it in ivartne.
> > >>
> > >> Gosh I say! The rotter!
> > >
> > > I gooved it was fgnaqneq cenpgvpr?
> > > (sorry hants, we all speak fluent rot in the shed)
> > >
> > >
> > dunno about fluent...
> 
> Here in Hants, flu' an' trot is a medical condition

That cursed gastric flu, the back door trots is too good a name for it.

-- 
^Ï^.         Sn!pe          <http://snipeco.ath.cx> (my test page)

My pet rock Gordon is hanging on to boost his pension.

The message 
from Tiddy Ogg  contains these words:

> >I once ohled some "spider repellant" for my sister who has a fear of such 
> >things. It was meant to be sprayed at doors and windows to keep them from 
> >entering. One of the active ingredients was horse chestnut extract.
> >
> >-=# Ben Coulson #=- 
> >

> Thanks folks.  It was brought up by Sarah Kennedy on Radio 2 this
> morning - mentioning a woman who believed it.

I reckon it's like hanging up dead moles and crows - the idea is that
the spider sees what looks like a de-legged spider-corpse and thinks
"Crikey, if they can kill one that size, what chance do I have?" and
legs it while it still has legs upon which to do the legging.

-- 
Skipweasel
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

The message 
from Holly G Pence  contains these words:

> >The sort that when you accost them with upturned cup and old postcard
> >from Penarth, because the sound of their hobnail boots on the lino is
> >too loud, look up at you with disdain and say "Sod off, mate"?

> The sort that, overnight, make vast webs across your front door, to
> snare you for breakfast when you try to leave for jbex.

Oh, stripy-legs. Loads of them, this year. The kids swing their legs
across the lawn to scare up crane-flies which they then catch and feed
to their favourite spider in the front garden's lavender. It's getting
rather bulbous on such a rich diet.

-- 
Skipweasel
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

Holly G Pence wrote:
> On Tue, 29 Sep 2009 15:07:23 +0100, Guy King 
> wrote:
> 
>> The message 
>>from Ron  contains these words:
>>>   Oh please tell me it's true, I can't do with them big house spids and 
>>> they are rife this year!
>> The sort that when you accost them with upturned cup and old postcard
>>from Penarth, because the sound of their hobnail boots on the lino is
>> too loud, look up at you with disdain and say "Sod off, mate"?
> 
> The sort that, overnight, make vast webs across your front door, to
> snare you for breakfast when you try to leave for jbex.
> 
> --Holly
Them be gardin spids, I dun mind them too much. Them can has give a 
narsty bite tho what!

UkuleleRon

The message <1j6v02r.9zn5py48uqiwN%snipe@spambin.fsnet.co.uk>
from snipe@spambin.fsnet.co.uk (Sn!pe) contains these words:

> That cursed gastric flu, the back door trots is too good a name for it.

The teacher in the class next to Pip is down with alleged Pigpest. The
pseudomum[1] of one of the girls in that class has been laid low for
ages with it.

[1] Complex situation, but she looks after them well despite a lot of
interference from agencies that should know better.

-- 
Skipweasel
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

In uk.rec.sheds,  (Guy King) wrote in
::

>The message 
>from Tiddy Ogg  contains these words:
>
>> >I once ohled some "spider repellant" for my sister who has a fear of such 
>> >things. It was meant to be sprayed at doors and windows to keep them from 
>> >entering. One of the active ingredients was horse chestnut extract.
>> >
>> >-=# Ben Coulson #=- 
>> >
>
>> Thanks folks.  It was brought up by Sarah Kennedy on Radio 2 this
>> morning - mentioning a woman who believed it.
>
>I reckon it's like hanging up dead moles and crows - the idea is that
>the spider sees what looks like a de-legged spider-corpse and thinks
>"Crikey, if they can kill one that size, what chance do I have?" and
>legs it while it still has legs upon which to do the legging.

Hmmm.  I suspect that attributes far more capacity for abstract thought
to spids then they actually deserve.
-- 
Marc

HANDLE WITH EXTREME CARE: This Product Contains Minute Electrically Charged Particles 
Moving at Velocities in Excess of Five Hundred Million Miles per Hour.  -- Hewitt / Subitzky

On Wed, 30 Sep 2009 13:48:40 +0100, Guy King 
wrote:

>I reckon it's like hanging up dead moles and crows - the idea is that
>the spider sees what looks like a de-legged spider-corpse and thinks
>"Crikey, if they can kill one that size, what chance do I have?" and
>legs it while it still has legs upon which to do the legging.

Or painting the gateposts with tiger dung to repel elephants.
Expensive, but works a treat - we've not seen an elephant round here
since we moved in.
 
Guy
-- 
http://www.chapmancentral.co.uk/

Albert Ross  wrote
>On Wed, 30 Sep 2009 10:20:48 +0100, Ron  wrote:
>> Esra Sdrawkcab wrote:
>>> On Wed, 30 Sep 2009 00:56:47 +0100, Roger Hunt  
>>>  wrote:
>>>> Graeme  wrote
>>>>> Ron  wrote in
>>>>> news:UsudnUxEJ49VaVzXnZ2dnUVZ8gNi4p2d@bt.com:
>>>>>
>>>>>>   Oh please tell me it's true, I can't do with them big house spids
>>>>>>   and
>>>>>> they are rife this year!
>>>>>
>>>>> Must be. There's not a conker to be had for thousands of miles round  
>>>>> here
>>>>> and the place has got loads of spiders, some of them quite nasty. Yet  
>>>>> again
>>>>> I believe the shed has solved one of life's great mysteries.
>>>>>
>>>> [Wikipedia]
>>>> In 1993 ex-Python Michael Palin was disqualified from a Conkers
>>>> competition in the United Kingdom for onxvat his conker and soaking
>>>> it in ivartne.
>>>>
>>>> Gosh I say! The rotter!

>>>  I gooved it was fgnaqneq cenpgvpr?
>>> (sorry hants, we all speak fluent rot in the shed)
>>>
>> dunno about fluent...
>
>it's electronic - like e-mail, so it's e-fluent.

More like effluent.
-- 
Roger Hunt

Guy King  wrote
>The message 
>from Tiddy Ogg  contains these words:
>
>> >I once ohled some "spider repellant" for my sister who has a fear of such 
>> >things. It was meant to be sprayed at doors and windows to keep them from 
>> >entering. One of the active ingredients was horse chestnut extract.
>> >
>> >-=# Ben Coulson #=- 
>> >
>
>> Thanks folks.  It was brought up by Sarah Kennedy on Radio 2 this
>> morning - mentioning a woman who believed it.
>
>I reckon it's like hanging up dead moles and crows - the idea is that
>the spider sees what looks like a de-legged spider-corpse and thinks
>"Crikey, if they can kill one that size, what chance do I have?" and
>legs it while it still has legs upon which to do the legging.
>
I noticed how placid and obedient all mountain gorillas became, after
King Kong was released, and how good they are at brushing their teeth
and combing their hair.
-- 
Roger Hunt

On Wed, 30 Sep 2009 20:27:22 +0100, Roger Hunt   
wrote:

> Albert Ross  wrote
>> On Wed, 30 Sep 2009 10:20:48 +0100, Ron  wrote:
>>> Esra Sdrawkcab wrote:
>>>> On Wed, 30 Sep 2009 00:56:47 +0100, Roger Hunt
>>>>  wrote:
>>>>> Graeme  wrote
>>>>>> Ron  wrote in
>>>>>> news:UsudnUxEJ49VaVzXnZ2dnUVZ8gNi4p2d@bt.com:
>>>>>>
>>>>>>>   Oh please tell me it's true, I can't do with them big house spids
>>>>>>>   and
>>>>>>> they are rife this year!
>>>>>>
>>>>>> Must be. There's not a conker to be had for thousands of miles round
>>>>>> here
>>>>>> and the place has got loads of spiders, some of them quite nasty.  
>>>>>> Yet
>>>>>> again
>>>>>> I believe the shed has solved one of life's great mysteries.
>>>>>>
>>>>> [Wikipedia]
>>>>> In 1993 ex-Python Michael Palin was disqualified from a Conkers
>>>>> competition in the United Kingdom for onxvat his conker and soaking
>>>>> it in ivartne.
>>>>>
>>>>> Gosh I say! The rotter!
>
>>>>  I gooved it was fgnaqneq cenpgvpr?
>>>> (sorry hants, we all speak fluent rot in the shed)
>>>>
>>> dunno about fluent...
>>
>> it's electronic - like e-mail, so it's e-fluent.
>
> More like effluent.

Well spotted!

-- 
Hi there!

Richard Robinson wrote:

>>>>
>>> Some of the ones we've been getting won't fit under a pint pot!
>> Thems int spiders, them's traffic wardens, silly.
> 
> You let traffic wardens onto your lino ?
> 
> 

Yes, the ceiling weed on it, it needs replacing, anyway. Even a
tarking picket couldn't make it look much worse, and it has been
parked thar a while.


-- 
When you let me fall, grew my own wings,
Now I'm as tall as the sky.

Holly G Pence wrote:
> On Wed, 30 Sep 2009 14:10:44 +0100, Ron 
> wrote:
> 
>> Holly G Pence wrote:
>>> On Tue, 29 Sep 2009 15:07:23 +0100, Guy King 
>>> wrote:
>>>
>>>> The message 
>>> >from Ron  contains these words:
>>>>>   Oh please tell me it's true, I can't do with them big house spids and 
>>>>> they are rife this year!
>>>> The sort that when you accost them with upturned cup and old postcard
>>> >from Penarth, because the sound of their hobnail boots on the lino is
>>>> too loud, look up at you with disdain and say "Sod off, mate"?
>>> The sort that, overnight, make vast webs across your front door, to
>>> snare you for breakfast when you try to leave for jbex.
>>>
>>> --Holly
>> Them be gardin spids, I dun mind them too much. Them can has give a 
>> narsty bite tho what!
>>
>> UkuleleRon
> 
> Ooh, I din't know them bited.  They've always been so well-behaved
> when joining me for tea.  Or beer.

Well so can owse spids, a mate of mine endedup in orspiddle when a 
biggun bit him on the hand - right betwixt thumb and first fingerer. 
Twas hiding in his barf towel.
His hand swelled up like an inflated marigold and much pain and dizzy 
sickness ensued, korse it transpired that he`s more allergic to the 
venom than most peeps.

The giant house spider can grow as much as five inches from leg end to 
leg end they say, and the are getting more common!  [1]

Ron T'Otheren

[1] that`s common as in prolific not common as in lacking in refinement 
or taste.

Holly G Pence  wrote
>On Wed, 30 Sep 2009 14:10:44 +0100, Ron 
>wrote:
>>Holly G Pence wrote:
>>> On Tue, 29 Sep 2009 15:07:23 +0100, Guy King 
>>> wrote:
>>>> The message 
>>>>from Ron  contains these words:
>>>>>   Oh please tell me it's true, I can't do with them big house spids and 
>>>>> they are rife this year!
>>>> The sort that when you accost them with upturned cup and old postcard
>>>>from Penarth, because the sound of their hobnail boots on the lino is
>>>> too loud, look up at you with disdain and say "Sod off, mate"?
>>> 
>>> The sort that, overnight, make vast webs across your front door, to
>>> snare you for breakfast when you try to leave for jbex.
>>> 
>>> --Holly
>>Them be gardin spids, I dun mind them too much. Them can has give a 
>>narsty bite tho what!
>>
>>UkuleleRon
>
>Ooh, I din't know them bited.  They've always been so well-behaved
>when joining me for tea.  

Do they prefer milk in first?
>Or beer.

Websters?
-- 
Roger Hunt

Ron  wrote
>
>The giant house spider can grow as much as five inches from leg end to 
>leg end they say, and the are getting more common!  [1]
>
I have yet to see the leg-end-'airy 5" giant house spider. 
-- 
Roger Hunt

Ron said:
> Holly G Pence wrote:
>> On Wed, 30 Sep 2009 14:10:44 +0100, Ron 
>>> Holly G Pence wrote:
>>>> On Tue, 29 Sep 2009 15:07:23 +0100, Guy King 
>>>> >from Ron  contains these words:
>>>>>>   Oh please tell me it's true, I can't do with them big house spids and 
>>>>>> they are rife this year!
>>>>> The sort that when you accost them with upturned cup and old postcard
>>>> >from Penarth, because the sound of their hobnail boots on the lino is
>>>>> too loud, look up at you with disdain and say "Sod off, mate"?
>>>> The sort that, overnight, make vast webs across your front door, to
>>>> snare you for breakfast when you try to leave for jbex.
>>>>
>>> Them be gardin spids, I dun mind them too much. Them can has give a 
>>> narsty bite tho what!
>> 
>> Ooh, I din't know them bited.  They've always been so well-behaved
>> when joining me for tea.  Or beer.
>
> Well so can owse spids, a mate of mine endedup in orspiddle when a 
> biggun bit him on the hand - right betwixt thumb and first fingerer. 
> Twas hiding in his barf towel.

I keep reading 'em as 'spuds'

-- 
Richard Robinson
"The whole plan hinged upon the natural curiosity of potatoes" - S. Lem

My email address is at http://www.qualmograph.org.uk/contact.html

Richard Robinson wrote:
> Ron said:
>> Holly G Pence wrote:
>>> On Wed, 30 Sep 2009 14:10:44 +0100, Ron 
>>>> Holly G Pence wrote:
>>>>> On Tue, 29 Sep 2009 15:07:23 +0100, Guy King 
>>>>> >from Ron  contains these words:
>>>>>>>   Oh please tell me it's true, I can't do with them big house spids and 
>>>>>>> they are rife this year!
>>>>>> The sort that when you accost them with upturned cup and old postcard
>>>>> >from Penarth, because the sound of their hobnail boots on the lino is
>>>>>> too loud, look up at you with disdain and say "Sod off, mate"?
>>>>> The sort that, overnight, make vast webs across your front door, to
>>>>> snare you for breakfast when you try to leave for jbex.
>>>>>
>>>> Them be gardin spids, I dun mind them too much. Them can has give a 
>>>> narsty bite tho what!
>>> Ooh, I din't know them bited.  They've always been so well-behaved
>>> when joining me for tea.  Or beer.
>> Well so can owse spids, a mate of mine endedup in orspiddle when a 
>> biggun bit him on the hand - right betwixt thumb and first fingerer. 
>> Twas hiding in his barf towel.
> 
> I keep reading 'em as 'spuds'
> 
the spuds were hiding down the plug ole

Richard Robinson  wrote
>Ron said:
>> Holly G Pence wrote:
>>> On Wed, 30 Sep 2009 14:10:44 +0100, Ron 
>>>> Holly G Pence wrote:
>>>>> On Tue, 29 Sep 2009 15:07:23 +0100, Guy King 
>>>>> >from Ron  contains these words:
>>>>>>>   Oh please tell me it's true, I can't do with them big house spids and 
>>>>>>> they are rife this year!
>>>>>> The sort that when you accost them with upturned cup and old postcard
>>>>> >from Penarth, because the sound of their hobnail boots on the lino is
>>>>>> too loud, look up at you with disdain and say "Sod off, mate"?
>>>>> The sort that, overnight, make vast webs across your front door, to
>>>>> snare you for breakfast when you try to leave for jbex.
>>>>>
>>>> Them be gardin spids, I dun mind them too much. Them can has give a 
>>>> narsty bite tho what!
>>> 
>>> Ooh, I din't know them bited.  They've always been so well-behaved
>>> when joining me for tea.  Or beer.
>>
>> Well so can owse spids, a mate of mine endedup in orspiddle when a 
>> biggun bit him on the hand - right betwixt thumb and first fingerer. 
>> Twas hiding in his barf towel.
>
>I keep reading 'em as 'spuds'
>
Funny - I get "aphids".
-- 
Roger Hunt

The message 
from Roger Hunt  contains these words:

> >A systemic insecticide mght do the wbo if you're going non-green.
> >
> The only systemic insecticide I use is a rolled-up copy of the local
> (very worthwhile) free paper, and I reckon that's pretty green. 

That's not systemic, that's systematic.

-- 
Skipweasel
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

Ron wrote:

> The giant house spider can grow as much as five inches from leg end to 
> leg end they say, and the are getting more common!  [1]

Truly, this is the age of heroes and leg ends.

-- 
When you let me fall, grew my own wings,
Now I'm as tall as the sky.

Roger Hunt wrote:
> Sn!pe  wrote
>> Roger Hunt  wrote:
>>
>>> Funny - I get "aphids".
>> Plant marigolds around yourself, that'll keep 'em off.
>>
> Is there something I could eat perhaps, to make the furry gnomes in my
> sweat repel them?

Conker-based afterfunir?


-- 
When you let me fall, grew my own wings,
Now I'm as tall as the sky.

Guy King  wrote
>The message 
>from Roger Hunt  contains these words:
>
>> >A systemic insecticide mght do the wbo if you're going non-green.
>> >
>> The only systemic insecticide I use is a rolled-up copy of the local
>> (very worthwhile) free paper, and I reckon that's pretty green. 
>
>That's not systemic, that's systematic.
>
Systematic implies some sort of co-ordination on my part, so I would use
the word sparingly.
-- 
Roger Hunt

Ancipital  wrote
>Roger Hunt wrote:
>> Sn!pe  wrote
>>> Roger Hunt  wrote:
>>>
>>>> Funny - I get "aphids".
>>> Plant marigolds around yourself, that'll keep 'em off.
>>>
>> Is there something I could eat perhaps, to make the furry gnomes in my
>> sweat repel them?
>
>Conker-based afterfunir?
>
I've got some Tea Tree shampoo here, in the Aphid Attack survival kit.
-- 
Roger Hunt

Roger Hunt wrote:
>> Conker-based afterfunir?
>>
> I've got some Tea Tree shampoo here, in the Aphid Attack survival kit.

Do you resemble a rose bush, by any chance?

-- 
When you let me fall, grew my own wings,
Now I'm as tall as the sky.

Ancipital  wrote
>Roger Hunt wrote:
>>> Conker-based afterfunir?
>>>
>> I've got some Tea Tree shampoo here, in the Aphid Attack survival kit.
>
>Do you resemble a rose bush, by any chance?
>
That's a thorny question ...
-- 
Roger Hunt

Ancipital 
wrote:

> funir

A new one on me, that; well rotted, Sah.

-- 
^Ï^.         Sn!pe          <http://snipeco.ath.cx> (my test page)

My pet rock Gordon is hanging on to boost his pension.

Ancipital 
wrote:

> > I've got some Tea Tree shampoo here, in the Aphid Attack survival kit.
> 
> Do you resemble a rose bush, by any chance?

You're planting nasturtiums!

-- 
^Ï^.         Sn!pe          <http://snipeco.ath.cx> (my test page)

My pet rock Gordon is hanging on to boost his pension.

Ancipital 
wrote:

> Truly, this is the age of heroes and leg ends.

IRTA fag-ends, Bogart.

-- 
^Ï^.         Sn!pe          <http://snipeco.ath.cx> (my test page)

My pet rock Gordon is hanging on to boost his pension.

Roger Hunt said:
> Ancipital  wrote
>>Roger Hunt wrote:
>>> Sn!pe  wrote
>>>> Roger Hunt  wrote:
>>>>
>>>>> Funny - I get "aphids".
>>>> Plant marigolds around yourself, that'll keep 'em off.
>>>>
>>> Is there something I could eat perhaps, to make the furry gnomes in my
>>> sweat repel them?
>>
>>Conker-based afterfunir?
>>
> I've got some Tea Tree shampoo here, in the Aphid Attack survival kit.

Do Tea Trees wash their hair very often ?

-- 
Richard Robinson
"The whole plan hinged upon the natural curiosity of potatoes" - S. Lem

My email address is at http://www.qualmograph.org.uk/contact.html

Richard Robinson  wrote
>Roger Hunt said:
>> Ancipital  wrote
>>>Roger Hunt wrote:
>>>> Sn!pe  wrote
>>>>> Roger Hunt  wrote:
>>>>>
>>>>>> Funny - I get "aphids".
>>>>> Plant marigolds around yourself, that'll keep 'em off.
>>>>>
>>>> Is there something I could eat perhaps, to make the furry gnomes in my
>>>> sweat repel them?
>>>
>>>Conker-based afterfunir?
>>>
>> I've got some Tea Tree shampoo here, in the Aphid Attack survival kit.
>
>Do Tea Trees wash their hair very often ?
>
Yes - with Teamotei shampoo.
-- 
Roger Hunt

Roger Hunt said:
> Richard Robinson  wrote
>>Roger Hunt said:
>>> Ancipital  wrote
>>>>Roger Hunt wrote:
>>>>> Sn!pe  wrote
>>>>>> Roger Hunt  wrote:
>>>>>>
>>>>>>> Funny - I get "aphids".
>>>>>> Plant marigolds around yourself, that'll keep 'em off.
>>>>>>
>>>>> Is there something I could eat perhaps, to make the furry gnomes in my
>>>>> sweat repel them?
>>>>
>>>>Conker-based afterfunir?
>>>>
>>> I've got some Tea Tree shampoo here, in the Aphid Attack survival kit.
>>
>>Do Tea Trees wash their hair very often ?
>>
> Yes - with Teamotei shampoo.

Ah, thanks, I wondered what that was for.

-- 
Richard Robinson
"The whole plan hinged upon the natural curiosity of potatoes" - S. Lem

My email address is at http://www.qualmograph.org.uk/contact.html

Roger Hunt says...
> 
> Sn!pe  wrote
> >Roger Hunt  wrote:
> >
> >> >> Funny - I get "aphids".
> >> >
> >> >Plant marigolds around yourself, that'll keep 'em off.
> >> >
> >> Is there something I could eat perhaps, to make the furry gnomes in my
> >> sweat repel them?
> >
> >A systemic insecticide mght do the wbo if you're going non-green.
> >
> The only systemic insecticide I use is a rolled-up copy of the local
> (very worthwhile) free paper, and I reckon that's pretty green. 
> (The other day I actually batted a house fly directly into a web nearby,
> and the spider popped out and grabbed it within about one second.)

I did sim'lar for a spider that was lurking in the corner of my 
windowsill one day.  Batted the fly, and was going to collect it and 
dump it in the bin, but before I could move the spider had rushed out 
and taken it home for dinner.  I dumped a few more there before she 
moved out.

-- 

Peter, from outside the asylum

I'm an alien
email: usenet at peterward dot adsl24 dot co dot uk
http://blowinsmoke.wordpress.com/
It's no coincidence that the most popular foods are generally slow, fat 
and easy to catch.
- Willy Eckerslyke

Ancipital says...
> 
> Ron wrote:
> 
> > The giant house spider can grow as much as five inches from leg end to 
> > leg end they say, and the are getting more common!  [1]
> 
> Truly, this is the age of heroes and leg ends.

Henry Cow, Batman!

-- 

Peter, from outside the asylum

I'm an alien
email: usenet at peterward dot adsl24 dot co dot uk
http://blowinsmoke.wordpress.com/
...being old takes all day.
- Dover Beach

Peter Ward  wrote
>Roger Hunt says...
>> Sn!pe  wrote
>> >Roger Hunt  wrote:
>> >
>> >> >> Funny - I get "aphids".
>> >> >
>> >> >Plant marigolds around yourself, that'll keep 'em off.
>> >> >
>> >> Is there something I could eat perhaps, to make the furry gnomes in my
>> >> sweat repel them?
>> >
>> >A systemic insecticide mght do the wbo if you're going non-green.
>> >
>> The only systemic insecticide I use is a rolled-up copy of the local
>> (very worthwhile) free paper, and I reckon that's pretty green. 
>> (The other day I actually batted a house fly directly into a web nearby,
>> and the spider popped out and grabbed it within about one second.)
>
>I did sim'lar for a spider that was lurking in the corner of my 
>windowsill one day.  Batted the fly, and was going to collect it and 
>dump it in the bin, but before I could move the spider had rushed out 
>and taken it home for dinner.  I dumped a few more there before she 
>moved out.
>
Mine moved out as well ... where do they go?
-- 
Roger Hunt

Roger Hunt wrote:
> Sn!pe  wrote
>> Roger Hunt  wrote:
>>
>>> Funny - I get "aphids".
>> Plant marigolds around yourself, that'll keep 'em off.
>>
> Is there something I could eat perhaps, to make the furry gnomes in my
> sweat repel them?

Spids or aphids? if it's spiddies, eat some conkers.

simples
rON T'oTHEREn

Roger Hunt wrote:
> Peter Ward  wrote
>> Roger Hunt says...
>>> Sn!pe  wrote
>>>> Roger Hunt  wrote:
>>>>
>>>>>>> Funny - I get "aphids".
>>>>>> Plant marigolds around yourself, that'll keep 'em off.
>>>>>>
>>>>> Is there something I could eat perhaps, to make the furry gnomes in my
>>>>> sweat repel them?
>>>> A systemic insecticide mght do the wbo if you're going non-green.
>>>>
>>> The only systemic insecticide I use is a rolled-up copy of the local
>>> (very worthwhile) free paper, and I reckon that's pretty green. 
>>> (The other day I actually batted a house fly directly into a web nearby,
>>> and the spider popped out and grabbed it within about one second.)
>> I did sim'lar for a spider that was lurking in the corner of my 
>> windowsill one day.  Batted the fly, and was going to collect it and 
>> dump it in the bin, but before I could move the spider had rushed out 
>> and taken it home for dinner.  I dumped a few more there before she 
>> moved out.
>>
> Mine moved out as well ... where do they go?
  Spider heaven

Ron  wrote
>Roger Hunt wrote:
>> Peter Ward  wrote
>>> Roger Hunt says...
>>>> Sn!pe  wrote
>>>>> Roger Hunt  wrote:
>>>>>
>>>>>>>> Funny - I get "aphids".
>>>>>>> Plant marigolds around yourself, that'll keep 'em off.
>>>>>>>
>>>>>> Is there something I could eat perhaps, to make the furry gnomes in my
>>>>>> sweat repel them?
>>>>> A systemic insecticide mght do the wbo if you're going non-green.
>>>>>
>>>> The only systemic insecticide I use is a rolled-up copy of the local
>>>> (very worthwhile) free paper, and I reckon that's pretty green. 
>>>> (The other day I actually batted a house fly directly into a web nearby,
>>>> and the spider popped out and grabbed it within about one second.)
>>> I did sim'lar for a spider that was lurking in the corner of my 
>>> windowsill one day.  Batted the fly, and was going to collect it and 
>>> dump it in the bin, but before I could move the spider had rushed out 
>>> and taken it home for dinner.  I dumped a few more there before she 
>>> moved out.
>>>
>> Mine moved out as well ... where do they go?

> Spider heaven

Gay nightclub for spiders?
-- 
Roger Hunt

Frank Erskine  wrote:

> >>That's not systemic, that's systematic.
> >
> >It's *Hydromatic*!
> 
> IRTA:- 'Hydrolastic'.

AKA "Hydrospastic"

-- 
^Ï^.         Sn!pe          <http://snipeco.ath.cx> (my test page)

My pet rock Gordon is hanging on to boost his pension.

The message <1j709t7.1i4hrjc1lo4zytN%snipe@spambin.fsnet.co.uk>
from snipe@spambin.fsnet.co.uk (Sn!pe) contains these words:

> AKA "Hydrospastic"

Jerky water? That'll be your prostrate(sic), mate.

-- 
Skipweasel
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

On Wed, 30 Sep 2009 09:19:02 +0100, "Albert Ross" 
wrote:

>in similar aphorisms: A bottle of Sherry's not just for Xmas

It is if I get hold of the bottle.

-- 
-Pip

The message 
from Guy King  contains these words:

> Even now, the kids have a vat of conkers marinading in the airing
> cupboard.

More so now - they got fed up with the rather competetive attitude of
some of the other kids about whose conker tree it was, so we wandered
off and found one well away from anyone. Took about ten minutes to
collect a couple of gallons of conkers.

-- 
Skipweasel
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

Guy King wrote:
> The message <fJRiXIA$6pwKFwB2@nospam.demon.co.uk>
> from Roger Hunt  contains these words:
> 
>> In 1993 ex-Python Michael Palin was disqualified from a Conkers
>> competition in the United Kingdom for onxvat his conker and soaking 
>> it in ivartne.
> 
>> Gosh I say! The rotter!
> 
> Even now, the kids have a vat of conkers marinading in the airing
> cupboard. I had to insist on a lid or all the towels would have smelt of
> vinegar.
> 
The best thing is to hollow them out and fill them with epoxy resin.

Albert Ross wrote:

>>
> It's all a conspiracy by the funcr-fuvsgvat (careful Frank) spiders that 
> rule us! the spiders hollow out the conkers to make nests for more spiders!
> 
> Nurse my foil hat has fallen off!

I for one welcome our new arachnid overlords.

The message 
from Mel Rimmer  contains these words:

> > Even now, the kids have a vat of conkers marinading in the airing
> > cupboard. I had to insist on a lid or all the towels would have smelt of
> > vinegar.
> > 
> The best thing is to hollow them out and fill them with epoxy resin.

I carefully split one and made a lead core and Araldited the shell back.
Wasn't as good as I hoped - though indomitable it lost the shell quite
quickly and gave the game away.

-- 
Skipweasel
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

On 04/10/09 13:37, Guy King wrote:

> The message
> from Mel Rimmer  contains these words:
>
>>> Even now, the kids have a vat of conkers marinading in the airing
>>> cupboard. I had to insist on a lid or all the towels would have smelt of
>>> vinegar.
>>>
>> The best thing is to hollow them out and fill them with epoxy resin.
>
> I carefully split one and made a lead core and Araldited the shell back.
> Wasn't as good as I hoped - though indomitable it lost the shell quite
> quickly and gave the game away.

Air-brushed carbon fibre?

Guy King wrote:
> 
> I carefully split one and made a lead core and Araldited the shell back.
> Wasn't as good as I hoped - though indomitable it lost the shell quite
> quickly and gave the game away.
> 

Wrong glue.  The shell will bend, and so will the lead, Araldite won't 
and will crack.

Andy

Guy King  wrote
>The message 
>from Mel Rimmer  contains these words:
>
>> > Even now, the kids have a vat of conkers marinading in the airing
>> > cupboard. I had to insist on a lid or all the towels would have smelt of
>> > vinegar.
>> > 
>> The best thing is to hollow them out and fill them with epoxy resin.
>
>I carefully split one and made a lead core and Araldited the shell back.
>Wasn't as good as I hoped - though indomitable it lost the shell quite
>quickly and gave the game away.
>
I have played Air conkers, coming to think of it. 
-- 
Roger Hunt

The message 
from Andy Champ <no.way@nospam.invalid> contains these words:

> > I carefully split one and made a lead core and Araldited the shell back.
> > Wasn't as good as I hoped - though indomitable it lost the shell quite
> > quickly and gave the game away.
> > 

> Wrong glue.  The shell will bend, and so will the lead, Araldite won't 
> and will crack.

Ah, well. I know that now, but I was only just starting secondary school.

-- 
Skipweasel
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.